You can let go. It’s an act of faith
Letting go is a spiritual practice.
Letting go is an act of faith.
The thing with closure is, you don’t have to get it to find it.
You may not ever get the sorry that’s owed to you.
Your sorry may not ever be received by who you’re trying to give it to.
You may not ever be paid back, recognised, validated… the situation with whoever it is, or whatever it is, may not ever come full circle and land peacefully, the way you want it to.
Justice may not happen... things may not be restored the way you dream, the way you hope, the way you want.
And that doesn’t mean you give up; you stop trying, you stop working for justice, you stop telling your story so that progress can be made. It doesn’t mean that you give up on hope, that goodness prevails, and forgiveness will heal you, and that peace is within your reach.
Because the thing with closure? It’s something you can do all on your own. You don’t need the other party to show up the way you want, need, hope them to, for you to find the peace you’re seeking.
You have permission to end it for yourself, find what you need within you.
It is there, I promise. It takes trust and faith and grace, but if you seek it, you will find it.
Much of closure is really about certainty, comfort, and being right.
Often, the search for closure is really the search for acceptance, inclusion, and absolution. We can’t live with what we’ve done, or what was done to us, until someone else signs off on its validity.
But you? You can create your own closure for yourself, by yourself; no permission needed, no validation called for.
Because here’s the thing: creating your own sense of closure is what gives you the strength to seek justice, create peace, build a meaningful life, learn from what it is you’ve been through, and rise like a phoenix through the flames.
Forgive yourself.
Forgive others without needing them to accept it.
Be your own advocate when it comes to your healing and becoming.
Seek acceptance from those who love you instead of those who make it hard for you.
Quit pleasing, quit striving, quit trying to win love.
There is grace for this journey, and within it is the peace you thought closure would finally bring you.
Paul wrote to his friends and said:
“And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap if we do not give up.”*
The opposite is true also: Allow yourself to grow weary of doing what is not good for you, for others, for your life, for your connection to the world, God, and yourself.
The spiritual practice of leaving things behind is holy and true and worthy of your time and participation. You don’t have to explain yourself, you don’t need permission, you don’t need the blessing and anointing of fifty elders and forty prayer warriors. If something is not working, and you know it deep in your gut - the place where Spirit and you are almost one - then, my friend, let it go, leave it behind, quit.
Rumi said,
“Be like a tree and let the dead leaves drop.”
The peace you seek might just be in letting go, not holding on; in finding acceptance within yourself and the will to move on even if things haven’t ended in a way that brings you comfort and certainty.
Mindful Prompt: The thing with closure is, you don’t have to get it to find it. You have permission to end that race for yourself and find what you need within you.
Continued in the upcoming series, "Finding Closure" this week with a subscription in the App.
* Galatians 6:9
Written by Liz Milani.
Instagram: @thepracticeco
