Does your mind race at night?

Thoughts keep you up at night, too?

In fact, the first thing to go when I’m stressed or anxious, even excited and hopeful, is my sleep. I was lying awake the other night, my brain pinging, skin tingling, heart racing, mulling over all of the things, when it suddenly hit me:

I can’t solve this tonight.

I don’t have to fix it right now.

You probably can’t solve this tonight.

I probably don’t have to fix it right now.

Take a breath. Rest. It will take time. Everything does. Urgency is rarely needed, even when we think it is.

We live for the big moments: The joy, the connection, the achievement, the applause, the triumph, the success, the love. Growing up in Church, we’d call them “Mountain Top Experiences.” Those moments of sheer beauty, we’re your completely taken by the joy of being alive; where you think: this, THIS is why I’m here.

We avoid those other big moments: the pain, the trauma, the tragedy, the betrayal, the disappointment, the failure, the uncomfortable. Growing up in Church, we’d call them “Valley or Dessert Experiences.” Those moments of bewilderment, suffering, even horror, where you’re completely taken by the pain of being alive, where you think: what, WHAT is even the point of being here?

We live between these two paradigms, wanting more of the mountain tops, hoping we never visit a valley again. And in both instances, we’re not being where we are. It’s tantalising to fantasise about that next rush of a life-affirming experience. It’s so anxiety building to worry and fear about what tragedy will hit next and from where and by whom.

And yet, this is where we most often live. In between. IN the normal spaces, the very human, ordinary, every day spaces. Nothing burning down, no magic moments, just sheer and unadulterated life happening all around us.

We live in The After.

Whether it's the aftermath of a life-altering event or the after-ness of a joyous celebration, we find ourselves caught between what was and what will be. It's a liminal space, neither here nor there, where the past lingers and the future beckons, yet the present feels like a murky haze.

This week, In The Practice Co App, we’re going to explore this space, its different textures and sounds, colours and tastes. We’re going to take a moment to breathe, remind ourselves that not everything needs to be fixed or completed right now, and that there is such a thing as post-traumatic growth - we don’t have to be defined by the trauma of valleys, or the rush of mountain tops.

Join me? New series, The After, starts now (Monday)

REMEMBER: In THE AFTER, we are challenged to let go of what we thought we knew and embrace the unknown, trusting that it will lead us to new possibilities.

Liz Milani xo
Instagram: @thepracticeco 

From this week’s series titled "The After" with a subscription in the App. Hope to see you there.