Do you live with shame?

Shame is a formidable force. It thrives on secrecy, festering in the hidden corners of our hearts, whispering lies about our worthiness and staining the fabric of our self-perception. It seeks to keep us small, hidden, quiet and afraid, looking over our shoulder, questioning our desires and intentions, causing us to wish that we were different. Shame comes in thick and heavy, and to avoid it we tend to play right into’s plan, we shut down. The ironic think about shame is that to get out from underneath it’s weight, you need to speak up, not shut down. The antidote to shame is not found in silence but in the courage to speak.

Brené Brown said:

"Shame derives its power from being unspeakable."

In the vast spectrum of human experience, shame speaks a universal language, transcending age, gender, and geography. Whether you're navigating the complexities of your primary relationship, you’re in a situation at work, or memories from your childhood sneak up on you, the echoes of shame can be felt - no one is immune.

Understanding Shame:

Shame is a complex emotional response to the belief that one is exposed, flawed, or unworthy. It often intertwines with guilt, but while guilt involves feeling bad about one's actions and experience remorse, shame centers on a deep-seated sense of being inherently defective. Unveiling shame requires confronting the stories we tell ourselves about our identity.

Brené went on to say:

"Shame is the most powerful, master emotion. It's the fear that we're not good enough." - Brené Brown

The Role of Organized Religion:

Organized religion, historically and presently, has been a significant purveyor of shame. Dogmas and doctrines, often wielded as tools of control, cast shadows of shame upon individuals who deviate from prescribed norms, or who even dare be too human. The fear of divine judgment, coupled with societal expectations propagated by religious institutions, can create a breeding ground for shame. Questioning these narratives is an act of reclaiming personal autonomy and challenging the mechanisms of control embedded within organized religious structures.

This week, we’ll peel back the layers of shame, not to exacerbate it’s power or reach, but to learn it’s source and hence create practices to help us live beyond shame, unfettered and free.

Meditation:

Take a moment to envision a space where shame loses its power. Imagine a place where your true self is welcomed with open arms, free from judgment. What does this space look like, and how can you carry its essence into your daily life?

Reflection:

1. How has shame manifested in your life, and what narratives has it woven into your self-perception?

2. In what ways has silence about shame contributed to its hold over your well-being?

3. Can you recall a moment when speaking about your shame led to liberation or understanding?

In our next exploration, we will delve into the roots of shame and its entanglement with societal narratives. As we navigate these waters together, remember: the journey to healing begins with the courageous act of unveiling our true selves (shame can’t survive in the light)

So much love, as always.

See you in the App,

Liz Milani xo
Instagram: @thepracticeco 

From this week’s series titled "Life Beyond Shame," with a subscription in the App. Hope to see you there.